Lately, I have felt as if every day, and every moment has been on a check list. So much going on. Moving, end of the school year, mission, Senior bowl Football game, moving (Oh did I already mention that...)a Baptism...Along with LIFE! Life that NEVER seems to slow down.
I am completely fidaziled...*No! I don't know if that is even a real word* but that is what I feel like-
FIDAZILED!
CRAZY!
How I have handled most of what was and is going on, is I just put everything in order and focued on that one thing...Not allowing myself to get to worked up and overwhelmed. While doing so, some things just haven't gotten done. Oh well! I am not going to flip out...staying focused!! (Ok-I have flipped out a time or two-Glad my children and husband love me *Psycho MoM/Wife*)
The list...
Justin Michael Pacheco Finally graduated High School. The family got ready to go to the High School Gym, most of us dressing up just a bit. We have only been to one other High School graduation, and that was in Bagdad for Sass's big night. In Bagdad, most people got dressed up, just a tiny little bit. You know, skirts...Nice shirts...
Well, we walked into the Gym and 'Bam'... It was the most casual setting I have ever been in. Pants, plain shirts...Nobody was dressed up. How to feel about that?? HMMMM-I will just say we walked in and didn't think a thing about it-It was surprisingly pleasant.
The school band was playing. People were talking. Again...The most casual setting.
"It was NICE!" *A little different of course-But nice*
We didn't sit where the other parents sat. I guess if you know us, we are kinda different already-we tend to keep to ourselves.
We wanted to see the whole thing, and not feel like we had to look over other peoples heads. I, at first, was a little sad we were not sitting down on the court with all the other proud parents and family members of the graduating class. UNTIL...It was time for the young adults to walk in. We got to see every face. Every smile. Every design on top of the caps... What a view.
When Justin walked through the door, My heart swelled with pride. I have felt that way before when Sass graduated...It was crazy how that feeling just warms your whole body, mind, and soul. This was only graduation...Imagine weddings and the greeting of grandchildren...Or...Sending a missionary off...
Anywho...
That was my son, who walked with pride and who was so HAPPY!!
I whistled to make sure he knew where we were sitting, and he looked up and thats when I just sorta lost it.
That night meant that Justin was going to be leaving soon...
*Man up Momma*
The Graduation was short and sweet...It was all over the place, and the kids who gave speeches, were themselves, no big deal! It was awesome!
Graduation-Check
Now we had a little young man that turned eight! Mr. Chase. So it was time to get his baptism all ready, and set, and of course go...
The baptism was simple, and was just right. What a very special time for Chase. I always get a little emotional when the kids have been baptized. It is just a huge step . Chase is such a special kid. He is the oldest of the last three. He was born at the time he was suppose to be...He has to be the leader of his two spirited little brothers...Chase is a worker-Chase is a wonderful kid...I am so Very Very proud of him! Him and his curly hair, and big blue eyes!
Mr. Chasers dad baptized him and his Grandpa confirmed him. That is very special...We now only have 2 more little boys that will get baptized. My kiddos are all growing up.
Baptism-Check
Football-Football-Football...Oh how we love to watch our boys play Football. Especially Justin. Justin has a pure love of the game. He is self driven, and has always put 150% into every play. Justin has played the game since he was 6, always in full pads-full contact. His team took state his Junior year...And they rocked the field his senior year, but lost and took second at State. It didn't matter to much to me, but I know it meant a whole lot to Justin. He was heart broken-it is just a game-But at the time...It was so much more to our son.
Anyways...Since Justin was a senior, he was given the opportunity to play one last time as a 'Kid' in the senior All Star bowl. He was so excited, and a couple of weeks before the game he would talk about having to get into shape. He would go run, and do some speed work...But he also had to work-So he wasn't able to really dive into getting ready for the game-mentally he was ready though.
Game day came, and it was such an amazing GAME!! I think I enjoyed it more than the State game that we won! Justin was in red and white #34...So awesome! He was able to play with boys that beat us in the State game this last year...and also boys from Bagdad-HE HAD A BLAST! Justin built up a strong bond with some of those boys-It was mentioned that the boys were saying they were finally glad that they got to play 'WITH' the Bagdad boys, instead of against. Justin's team won-it was wonderful. After the game was even better. Watching Justin get hugs from boys from both sides, seeing him laugh and take pictures with new found friends for life was so overwhelming. A young man walked up to Justin and told him he was a once in a lifetime kind of player...It was special.
Speaking of special...
At the end of the game they were giving out awards. As we stood there listening to other boys names be called out, we just figured 'Oh well'... Until it was time for the MVP award for the game. The announcer said, 'This players name was mentioned for all of the awards', '#34 Justin Pacheco'.
Oh my goodness! I was so proud...Justin was recognized for who he was and for all of the hard work. Justin lit up like a star, and you know what...Most ALL of the other players were just as happy for him.
That was a moment I will never ever forget!
Football Game-Check
Moving...Oh my gosh! To move a family of this size twice in 6 months...My goodness-I can't even express how tough it has been. I do realize that we are not the only big family to move twice in a year, but oh my GOSH! It has been pretty stressful.
**I will be blogging more about the move later**
Moving-35% checked...
I really believe that we are being put to the test. With so much going on, and to think about getting our son out on a mission-I have aged a good two years just with the thought of all that needs to be done.
So in my mind..Graduation, baptism, football game, Mission-with Moving filling in every crack that we have had for spare time. Since its in my mind like that...How come it doesn't feel as smooth as it feels to think of it that way.
Preparing a missionary to head out into the mission field...It doesn't take that much, but there are so many distractions that come out of the blue. One thing after another...after another. d
Hurdles have had to be jumped, and mountains have had to be climbed. I am so very thankful for a strong willed son, a patient and ever so caring Bishop, family who is so excited to see Justin go, and for a loving Heavenly Father who has had to wrap his arms around me as I have shed quite a few tears over it all...Lots and lots of praying on my knees, needing guidance and comfort.
It is worth all of the tears and effort...Let me tell you why.
I have seen my son thrive and struggle. I have seen Justin go from never wanting to go on a mission because he wanted to play football instead...To without a doubt, knowing that he needs to serve a mission...Saying, that if he is meant to play football when he gets home, then that is what he will be doing. We have always told Justin that it was his decision. We were never going to make him serve a mission. I'm not going to lie, I used to nudge him a little bit and say it would be good for him-He just would tell me 'I am not to sure about that'. Justin never had a desire to go...Not until this time last year. He became very determined.
Two years of teaching the Gospel of Jesus Christ is only the beginning. Justin is going to come home and continue to touch peoples lives just by being Justin-Continuing to teach the Gospel.
The mission will not be checked off until we have dropped Justin off at the MTC June 24th. We are about 50% done with having Justin ready to go. We are going shopping tomorrow morning, and headed to the Gilbert Temple tomorrow night...Everything is starting to fall into place. It is crazy amazing.
There are no words to really explain how I feel right now at this very moment. All the things that have happened...All of the things that should have torn us apart and that has caused us so much tornment and pain...has only built us up and have made us stronger in so many different ways.
As we are still going through the thorns trying to reach the roses, I know that some day...we will get to look back at all of these crazy times and feel so very blessed that we were able to grow in ways that only tough times can help you grow.
As Justin would say...'The struggle is Real!'
Even though I think my head is going to fall off and my heart is going to burst from all of the stress and overwhelming emotions-I wouldn't change a thing.
**A HUGE thank you to everyone who sent Justin a card for graduation. The money he has recieved is helping to get him out on his mission...It has been amazing to see how loved Justin is! Thank you for all the well wishes, positive thoughts, and most of all-all the prayers and blessings...God Bless!**
By the way...All of the kids are doing pretty good. Still getting adjusted-Dealing with change once again since we are moving into another house. Sass is working and spreading her wings a little bit more each day. Nicci and Jessi are amazing. Bobcat and Jazzi are so happy and silly. Chase, Tot, and Champ are LOUD and wrestle ALL of the time. Our house is out of control...I just have to giggle when the kids aren't looking...otherwise-I have the wooden spoon in hand...*I have become soft in my old age!*
More on the move soon, and pictures...
Smiling :O)
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