Different

 

I have been sitting outside for most of the day.

The windchimes and hummingbirds. The breeze whispers that cooler days are coming. I am in my happy place.

Saying that I have been reflecting on life would be an understatement. For the last several days, but especially today, my mind has been telling me stories.

Stories about my youth. Stories about my marriage. Stories about my beliefs. Stories about who I am. Stories of who I want to be. Stories about how I should have put my foot in my mouth several times. Stories about how I should never feel bad for my opinion and for vomiting my thoughts into words. Stories about grief. Stories about my mother and father. Stories about my experience of being a momma. Stories of being a grandma. Stories of being healthy and strong. Stories of peace….The list could go on.

Some would maybe call this crazy and say that I probably need therapy. Who says that they are wrong? However, I would remind them rather quickly how grateful I am for these stories; they keep me grounded and remind me that I am 100% human with a desire to learn from my experiences.

One particular story…

Throughout my life, I have said that I have never really fit in the mold. At home, at work, at church, at school, or even at Walmart. I want to say that I am uniquely special.

One of the brief moments I got to spend with my dad during his last week on this earth was when he apprised me, gently telling me that I was different from the others. Those words he shared with me have stuck with me, and I can hear him whisper those words to me often, especially if I become lonely in my little world. It is a beautiful reminder that it is okay to be different.

Normal is foreign to me. Yet, the question would be what is normal, and who gets to say what it is or isn’t?

Come to think of it, I do not believe I ever cared about being normal or fitting in, not in my youth or while growing into my second childhood.

I was created to be different. I was made to see the flowers and rainbows. I was created with a mindset that there is a positive to every negative. I was created to see the good in others. I was created to also struggle, at times, to see the good in others but to forgive quickly….The list could go on.

One thing, without a doubt, those who know me, really know me, love me just the way that I am. Not to mention the creator himself…I am uniquely his.

So, I will carry on being perfectly okay, not fitting into the “normal” box.