Discipline...Hhmmm!

When I was growing up...We had a paddle 'Big Red'. It was big, and Red...and had a bunch of little holes. Everyone of us feared this 'Big Red'. I remember we all would line up to get out swats-Oldest to youngest(I am the Baby). We would get swats but not very often...Only when we did something seriously wrong. Fighting, Lying, Not getting our stuff done, talking back to our parents-BEING DISRESPECTFUL! Now, Since I was the baby I did not get a bunch of swats...I was spoiled in a sense. My older brother would usually take mine...Bless his heart!! I don't recall any of us getting a ton of swats, and I think it is because we knew better-It only took once!! I will say that I will never ever forget my last swats...My dad asked me not to say or talk about something with my mother...And I did! Boy O Boy! I did get swatted...But I understood why my dad had disciplined me. I disobeyed him! Plain and simple. He never swatted me again-I think it broke his heart! When I was growing up, I did feel as though my parents were mean and harsh. But now, trying to teach and raise my own 9 children...I get what they were trying to do. I UNDERSTAND! I was not beaten. I was not mistreated...I learned at a young age to be respectful of my elders! I was not a perfect teen, and I still did the little rebellious stuff *had a boyfriend-drove the truck while my parents were gone-wore short shorts to school when my dad was out of town ;O)-The little stuff* Even though I did those things, I always knew where the line was...And I never crossed it(So I say! My parents may disagree!). I never spoke disrespectful to my leaders, coaches or teachers. I am very thankful for how I was raised!
We discipline our children in a similar way. We don't agree with grounding, because usually the kid will end up doing the same thing again knowing that they will only not get to do some things for a week or so. We have never counted...1..2...3-Well in a mockery kind of way-I would start 10 5 1-. I have tried the nose in the corner...and that NEVER worked. The only thing that has worked, for us, is paddling the bum!  It isn't an all the time thing...just for the serious stuff! We don't have children that hit(beyond the normal...brotherly love kind of hit-Yes! Our boys) We don't have mean children(so I say). For the most part, we have pretty well behaved kids! I have to admit that we have eased up a tad with our Champ, well even with our last 4(Yikes)-We are working on doing better because we can sure see the difference in their behavior compared to the older kids for sure! You don't throw yourself on the ground and start kicking...And don't you even think about yelling at me or anyone else saying 'I hate you'...You will not learn that it is ok at a young age to talk like that to others-Especially, your Elders.
We have taught the kids to say 'Yes Sir' 'Yes Mamm' 'No Sir' and 'No Mamm'. This shows discipline and respect. Many times adults will tell my children not to say that to them...I understand...But I will still tell my children to continue saying it. It is easy to be lazy and say Yeah...Yup...But it does take a bit of self control to say Yes Sir! I was raised the same way. I didn't say it like I should have, and it wasn't until I had children that I understood once again why my parents taught us to say it to adults. It Shows RESPECT! It doesn't mean that a kid is bad because they don't say this...Don't read into this like that!
So...The reason that I am Blogging about this, is there has been so much talk about spanking and such in the school.
Please remember...This is MY opinion and I am not out to argue with anyone!
Back in the old days at school...We would get Bologna slices-or we would get swats from the principle-or there was detention or In House that was not fun! The teachers could tell us to behave and our parents supported them(for the most part, there has always been the parents that believed their child could do no wrong). One thing I knew, and have taught my children, is if you get busted at school, it will be 10Xs worse at home. I knew if I ever went to the office...I was a gonner...Ask me how many times I got in trouble at school...Not very many!
I feel that we have become extremely soft. So soft that kids are very disrespectful to adults and other children as well. kids attitudes have gotten so bad-My Goodness! There is very little consequences for misbehavior in a classroom, playground. In fact, I have heard so much lately that the teachers are the ones who are being disciplined for getting onto a student. I had teachers who were strict. We knew to go into the classroom sit down and be quiet or it was going to not be good.  We feared some of the teachers...But learned respect by the end of the school year. How can we expect our children to learn if they aren't in an environment that is controlled and structured. Discipline is a must. I will say, Our oldest boy, his 2nd grade teacher was very strict and structured...Our son did so well that year! Do I think teachers should hit a kid...no! Do I think the teacher has the right to raise their voice and tell a student to knock it off-YES! I am not for a teacher who is going to yell the whole day...But if the child isn't listening-get their attention. Grab em by the ear and drag them to the principles office...Kids need to know how to listen and to RESPECT!
My dad was a principle who had a paddle in his office-He used it...And I guarantee the kids didn't have to go back for a second one.... But they soon took that away. I guess there are still some states that allow paddles at school, and parents are just not for it. What would I do if my children were to attend a school where they still used the paddle?? I can tell you, that I have always told the teachers that if my son/Daughter ever get out of line they can thump them-make them run a mile on the track-Make them do push ups in front of the class...If my child was bad enough and disrespectful enough to deserve a swat from the principle...You bet!! In fact give me the paddle. How will my kid ever learn if there isn't a consequence hard enough to make them think 'Hey...I never want to do that again'!
So here it is-We have gotten soft at school and in sports. My dad wasn't a rough coach because he wanted all the boys to hate him, he wanted to teach them to be hard working men! I use my dad for an example because I have had so many tell me how thankful they are that my dad was as hard as he was-Many have said...I am the man that I am today because of him...We forget that we are raising our future leaders...
I love my children, and I don't want them to be mistreated by a teacher or coach...I have had experience with this and it isn't fun. We have had an experience of a teacher not listening to our child-He needed to go to the bathroom-Yes! He should of made sure to go before it was class time*I get this* but he is a boy, and boys don't hold it very well...The teacher would not allow him to go...and He ended up wetting his pants! That was bad...But we didn't pull him from the class and he changed his clothes went back to his seat and learned that he must go when bathroom breaks were allowed! Kids really do abuse that privilege and so that freedom of raising your hand to see if you can go to the restroom has been limited! I can't say that I was happy with that teacher...He had to go-She should of let him go! But, I want my children to be disciplined when needed and in the proper manner. But what I think is proper, most people disagree with. Not doing what they should in class...Seriously...give em a cocoa! Not paying attention at practice or messing around...Heck yeah! Make him run or do push ups (this goes for my daughters as well during volleyball basketball or softball)I would rather that my kid learns how to listen during practice so that when they get on the field for a football game they are ready and will know how to do things so that they wont get hurt.
If my daughter or son threw their helmet on the sideline or in a duggout...If I haven't gotten to them first, I hope the coach rips their butts. If my kid talks in class or is misbehaving-You bet...They are going to be busted when they get home. I want my kids to be strong leaders who are not going to be so babied that they aren't going to be able to handle certain situations...Yes! I believe the discipline at home and at school, those 12 long years, are what teaches these young adults to be great leaders!
I can't say that my kids wont turn out to be terrible people...I can't say that my kids are never going to get into trouble...Because I am pretty sure they will...But I really do believe that we have tried to teach them the right way to act, and we started when they were just babies! Again...Champ might be our worst nightmare-Heaven help the teachers and coaches! We are trying! We may have to just home school that kid-Save everyone the trouble :O) Now...I will also say that I have seen and dealt with some teachers that after I have walked out of their classroom I have wondered why they even became teachers....But, with that being said...Teaching is a thankless job! Can't please everyone! I do hope that if anyone reads this and they are thinking about becoming a teacher...Please make sure you are doing it for the love of learning and teaching...You are doing it because you LIKE children...Otherwise...Teaching is not for you :O)
One more thing...Kids now a days are pretty lazy and are not made to work! I don't get this...Kids need chores-I wish we had a ranch so that I always had hard work for our children to do. But we don't...so I have to work with what we have...Taking out the trash, cleaning the bedrooms, cleaning bathroom, doing dishes, sweeping, mopping, cleaning windows, vacuuming, mowing the lawn, pulling weeds, running hills, running the neighborhood, putting your clothes away, rubbing dads feet*ok...thats not a chore*...Anyway-You get the point. It doesn't hurt the kids to work-it will help them in the long run! SO I SAY!! *especially if they are working with their parents or siblings...Nothing works better than Teamwork!
There is such importance in discipline with love! If we didn't love our children, we wouldn't be so hard on them. Disciplining is hard...
There are more hugs and kisses given then swats in our home. There is always the 'I love you son-I love you Daughter'! There are prayers that are said throughout the day with and for the kids. I love them so very very much! I can't say it enough. We have great kids...And we let them know we are proud of them!